Plan Session Devotion: It’s Our Heart God is After
I know you will be encouraged by this devotion written by a sweet friend, dear wife and mama, beautiful writer and creative shop owner, Lauren Mills of Mercy Ink Designs. It is an honor to have her share parts of her heart and story of disappointment and faith with us.
My husband, Adrian, always says that God doesn’t desire for His will for your life to be a big secret. I nod in agreement most of the time, but when things don’t go as expected in our lives, I take a step back and ponder the truth of those words.
Three years ago this January, Adrian was preaching on a cold Sunday morning. It was a message about saying yes to God right now, not letting excuses come in the way of obedience. Right in the middle of his preaching, as he describes it, the Holy Spirit arrested his heart and spoke clearly, “I’m speaking to you, Adrian. No more excuses. It’s time to move forward and begin the adoption process.” We’d talked about adopting for nearly a decade at that point, even before we married. But life happened; moves and babies and job changes and ministry and more surprise babies. The timing just never seemed right. On that day, though, the Lord made it clear: “Now.”
Yet, what followed was anything but a clear path forward. We prayed fervently over each step and moved forward with adopting a beautiful little three year old girl from DR Congo. We completed the court process and by Congolese law, she was a Mills. More importantly, she was a daughter in our hearts. I was able to fly over and meet this precious girl we called ours. But two years into our journey, we learned she had been trafficked. She had a biological mother that wanted her, and in a painful yet redemptive turn of events, she was returned home, right where she belonged. While we rejoice for her, it was one of the darkest seasons our family has ever walked through.
We weren’t sure what was next. What was God doing? We wanted to escape the call, but still we felt Him nudge us forward. He told us “Now.” He told us “Go.”
So go we did. Cautiously, we transitioned to the domestic adoption program and were overjoyed to match with an expectant mom last June. Yet, tragedy hit our adoption journey again. That sweet baby was born in July with a genetic disorder incompatible with life. Hospice was brought in and that tiny baby has now gone on to be with the Lord. As of today, we continue to wait for the child God has planned for our home.
It’s confusing, isn’t it? We are walking in full obedience, yet our life circumstances look so drastically different than how we imagined. Our hearts say “yes” to the Lord, but every way we turn, nothing goes as planned.
But here’s what I’ve come to believe about following God when nothing goes as planned: His will for you, above anything you could DO, is to trust Him. While I could question what He’s up to and why He allowed our story to unfold like it did, ultimately, He longs for my heart. He longs for my trust.
At one especially low point for us, we sensed God clearly saying, “If you let me, I will get glory out of your story.” He did not promise a certain outcome. He did not tell us that if we trusted, all would happen according to our plan. What He did speak to us, and what He speaks to you today, friend, is that He will be glorified in your life when you are found in Him.
If you’ve sought to obey him but things aren’t quite falling into place, decide in your heart to trust Him anyway. Decide that it is all worth it. Decide that He is able to fulfill every plan He has for you, in His perfect timing.
“I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust” (Psalm 91:2).
This devotion is one of many that are part of our Plan Session. To find all the Plan Session Devotions, please click here. We have the free Plan Session Study available in our library you may access by signing up here or below for our updates. We pray these words spoke truth and life to your heart. If they have, will you share in comments with us?